How to write a movie pitch that hooks
A great logline has four components: identifiable protagonist, concrete want, clear antagonist, and stakes (what's lost on failure). Miss any and the pitch feels incomplete. The classic formula: "When X (protagonist in one word) discovers Y (inciting incident), they must Z (action) before W (consequence)". It works because it packages want, obstacle and clock into a single sentence.
- Lead with one-word protagonist. "An architect", "a baker", "a single mother". Producer pictures it instantly.
- Add the inciting incident. The event that breaks the routine.
- Define the action. What the protagonist must do.
- Close with stakes. What's lost on failure. No stakes, no tension.
- Imply a twist. One unexpected word signaling this isn't generic.
Common pitch mistakes
Most common: abstract pitches that read like emotional synopses. "A story about forgiveness" isn't a pitch — it's a theme. Another: too many proper nouns or details a producer can't retain. And a third: no clear stakes, where the protagonist has nothing to lose. No urgency, no movie.
Typical logline structure
- Setup: protagonist + initial situation.
- Inciting incident: what breaks the routine.
- Action: what the protagonist must do.
- Stakes: what's lost on failure.
After generating
- Pick the pitch that best combines clarity and twist.
- Verify the four components (protagonist, inciting incident, action, stakes).
- Read it aloud to three people: do they want more?
- Refine until it fits in one breath.
- Save three versions for different contexts: festival, production company, platform.